mmm.. super unproductive day..

supposed venue not conducive at all and is headache inducing instead.. and came home to jog but it rained heavily instead.

sigh..

and hope everything went well for the grading.. too bad i couldn't go..
praying hard..!

stress is mounting.. but yes we can!

add oil!!!!

finally done with my term papers before reading week starts! haha

lots and lots of catching up to be done.. mmm. and i know it will be more xingku for her.
shall work hard together..!

anyhow, got this sudden urge to cook and read more. drive more.. because i understand that i am severely trying to hug buddha's leg or car's tire in trying to rush my driving test on 30th dec. :S
another big and upcoming thing is my SEP.
looking at my mental calendar, i really have very little time before going over.. so many things yet to be done and i'm quite apprehensive about it. maybe its because we are going to part for quite long? mmm.. i do trust her alot.. just that wont be able to be first person for her during that four months.. :(

anyway, its exam period and yes. nobody is reading this.. add oil everyone.. and nana(:

HELLO!

my non-existing readers. hahaha!

i'm officially 23 to my own dismay. it's pretty sad that most of my female counterpart are doing something else already, while im still studying?

mmm. being from a not as "well to do" family, i work for what i have.. this concept had been ingrained in me since young, or rather, i made myself believe in it.

however, there were still times when i will hope for little miracles to appear. it can be materialistic, like for a little pup to appear on 13th birthday which it did.. jaime! well maybe it's not very materialistic, or my mum ordering my fav stuffed crust. or letting me try how a slice of ice-cream cake taste like on my 18th birthday. During xmas, i have also hoped for santa claus to come. it's as though, if i close my eyes for long enough, my wishes will come true.. and sometimes when the wishes are not met, i hope to sleep tru my bday hoping that i can lengthen it by not looking at the clock.

but this year especially, i realised i've grown up. it didn't matter all of a sudden of course, it is just that i only noticed it now.

this year's bday.. i didnt want anything. maybe i am less attention seeking.. or maybe i already have the best present in this world.. i guess it will be this way from now on.
i mean, with her that i am able to hold, smile and cry together.. every day is a birthday.
there's nth i want more.. except to make her smile and happy(:

hellweek is finally over. somehow, i didn't seem like i worked as hard or as well.
mm, or is it because i have an energy source next to me that i always feel recharged?

i'm quite sure it is.. mm.

(:

r as arrrgh, n as en. shut up please.

really irritating.

yay. (:

finally got network in school! hope this is sustainable. HAHA.

mmm.. really really need to get started on all my projects.. stress is mounting. or rather, i'm trying to let it mount.. if not i won't accomplish anything.. should use this semester to pull up my cap..

seriously, my home is the soil of laziness..

lucky now i have an organiser? mm.. hope i can do something for her also.. she is getting stressed. anyhow.. i'm blessed!

it's my fault.. shldn't have let you know..i rather be the only one that's not so happy?

sigh. hope you are feeling better already..

seriously seriously behind time.

need to post the SEP application to partner uni and start catching up on my readings... and start outlining projects?

oh no. i have a lazybone to get rid of..

i'm finally done with this concert.. and it was scary and shaky. mm.
and i got sorethroat(together with trembling in cold sweat and headache) for the 2nd/3rd time in a month?
seriously irritated with myself.

so weak please. ARGH.

time to regain my health.. and to catch up on my school work. sigh.

wednesday!

sigh.. bad day.

ich kenne ich bin nicht allein.

today's the first day of school! officially, albeit i do not have any tutorials yet.

it's really funny how i didn't write about what has happened throughout this 3 months holiday. finished a major exam without any breather, went to work, planned an overseas trip to europe and executed it... eventually winning a grand prix!

but.. it's just beyond me to write everything down. it is difficult to write some part without putting lesser emphasis on another. and sometimes things are more meaningful kept.
I will just keep all these memories in me.
i am just glad there's someone standing next to me when we won the grand prix and it has been this way ever since! (:

nvm i didn't have enough break.

it's now time to start a new chapter!

today's finally the last day of work!!

seriously, i really really dread working here.
i'm underpaid + unearthly working hrs that made me lose my social life + my swimming/running regime? okay, not forgetting feeling stupid doing the non-challenging tasks and being unappreciated.. sigh.

alright. enough nagging.. maybe it's because i'm feeling terrible now. my nose and throat are killing me.

I will do this entire job all over again for 10 more times if just one of this time allows me to take the same bus with her.. and to send her home safely.

call me silly.
i don't mind being a happy silly(: